Totally and utterly baffled.

10. For Incidents Abroad.

Posted in Uncategorized by loisemma on July 15, 08

America was a glittering adventure. The city was humid and hot. We partied all night, drinking cold beers and smoking ourselves silly. I got higher with every hit like a floating kite, but really felt it when I locked lips with B. Finally, familiar puffy white clouds hugged me with happiness. A feeling I’d miss and will once again. I watched the bright lights of funfairs and Times Square with glazed eyes, completely withdrawn from a different kind of society. B was my favourite drug. Fuck uppers, he was all I needed. All the sides switched. Him being the one to hold my clammy hands in the middle of the village. The one who grabbed me when we got out of the car after an adrenaline filled day to keep my full heart beating fast. Telling me on packed trains that he’d read the letter. That we’re allowed to make mistakes and how he was sorry it was too late. That he loved me too. Except, this time, I was less in love. Guilty pleasures have taken over my mind and I could be moving on.

We took more and more and lifted up our skinny arms, opened our mouths and forgot our troubles on super-exciting rides. Our feet got achey and our minds grew tired with time but we didn’t care. I ran my hands through gorgeous golden hair. Just like old times. I was sad to go home. I buried my hair in B’s soft crimson sweatshirt that smelt like him on the plane on the way home. My eyes leaked a little.

Anyway, as much as I love you, New York City, I love my new MBMJ’s bracelet.. Thanks, M!


As upset I was before, I am as happy now. Everything has slotted together perfectly and I’m once again happy. Let’s hope this keeps up. Just like I was.


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